Category Archives: Satire
Why pastors have it easy
To be technical, I work 2 hours a week because we have 2 services. 🙂
Streaks of the Penguins
Yet another sad day for The LCMS
Yes, it’s another sad day for The Lutheran Church – Missouri Synod. Another mission has been closed, this time in Burkina Faso and Togo, West Africa. Rev. James May and family will be leaving their missions this summer. The reason why: money. Unfortunately, money takes precedence over the Gospel. This comes from his latest newsletter:
I regret to inform you that due to programmatic and business decisions, World Mission has decided to cease employing me as a missionary in West Africa. This decision came as a shock to me and my family as it may also be a surprise to you.
World Mission has been pressuring me to move on and inform you as soon as possible. One reason is that I would be without a paycheck and insurance soon after we have a baby due in July. We hope that by the grace of God we could have another call in place when my salary and benefits terminate at the end of August 2008.
The decision leaves three newly planted churches in Burkina Faso without a theologically trained leader and also the Lutheran Church of Togo without a missionary which they had been awaiting for six years. Please keep all these people involved in your prayers.
I didn’t know him and his family all that well. I think I met him and his wife at an LLL deal or something during summer Greek back in 2001. Our thoughts and prayers go out to him and his family (with a baby on the way), the churches of Burkina Faso and Togo, and for the Church throughout the world so that the Gospel of Christ may continue to be preached, regardless of the cost.
What I’m hoping won’t happen will be the following announcement. Please note, this is purely satire and has not happened (and we pray that it won’t)!
ST. LOUIS – Churches close their doors across the country
Many churches across the country have closed their doors due to lack of funding. A decision by The Lutheran Church – Missouri Synod’s Board for Poor Church Spending (BPCS) has closed the doors of some 6100 churches because money became a bigger issue than the spreading of the Gospel. No statement was available, as there was no one left to say anything about the issue.
UPDATE 5/8/08
It has been brought to my attention that money was not the issue behind Rev. May’s termination as a missionary in West Africa. My apologies for any misconceptions.